It is a fine time. Full of good food, cakes and cozy in-door activities. With family or good friends.
However. I notice I am very lonely. Everyone is occupied on their own turf. And from being the leader of the pack as a youngster among my friends, I am now the outsider. I have placed myself there possibly. Everyone, or so it seems, have closer friends, or even girlfriends/boyfriends.
The point is: I miss to have someone very close to me. To have more than a familiar hug. To wake up and not be alone. I miss it terribly. No queer detail or obsession with abstract thought can mend that feeling.
I feel rejected.
